If you live with trauma, grief or chronic pain, it’s easy to get pulled off centre and to feel like something is wrong with you.
Trauma can knock the wind right out of you, your self-acceptance, sense of belonging and even your identity. That doesn’t mean something is wrong with you but if that trauma comes from childhood, it can be pretty hard to convince a person they are “normal,” whatever that even means.
The beauty of being a human being in this time is that we get to choose where we put our focus, how we show up in this world with whatever inner and outer resources we have or are lacking, and for many of you, myself included, how to be a bridge between what is falling away and the new energies that are here, and constantly flowing in.
So What’s the Key to Self-Acceptance and Self-Love?
YOU. Yes, it sounds simple and might even feel impossible… but it is true.
YOU are a unique expression of life itself.
YOU were not born by mistake.
And YOU are the only one who can fulfill your unique purpose in this lifetime. It’s not about putting pressure on yourself to find your almighty purpose either. You can live your purpose in fleeting moments, and grow that to feeling like you have a life filled with purpose.
Now, I know for Indigenous, Black, racialized, disabled or if you’re a part of the 2-Spirit or Queer community, this all can sound like big privilege, but hear me out. We can all start with what we have, from wherever we are.
I acknowledge that I have had a lot of privilege in my life, as well as intersectional experiences of the opposite, and I can tell you that I still struggle sometimes with self-acceptance and thinking something must be wrong with me. With practice and support, that struggle has shifted, even when I’ve been thrown into a new trauma or trigger.
When you grow your self-acceptance and self-love little by little, you can hold more space for yourself to bring meaning and purpose into your life.
How to Grow Your Self-Love and Self-Acceptance
What are YOU willing to do that is DIFFERENT than what you have done before and are doing now, in order to change the world? It doesn’t have to be some huge leap. Baby steps over time are sometimes actually MORE effective, especially for folks carrying trauma.
What are YOU willing to take aligned action on in order to fulfill your purpose? You don’t even need to know what your purpose is right now. You can search this blog for other posts about identity and purpose to help you get a fresh start.
What are YOU willing to STOP doing and believing in order to improve your life? Some things we can’t control, but some things we can and I’m not just talking about manifesting or spiritual bypassing here. We can control at least some of our responses to situations, and with support we can calm down trigger responses over time. That can help you to feel more of a sense of inner authority and self-sovereignty.
Most people with a lot of privilege are NOT willing to walk through their fear and doubt, take leaps of faith and make bold moves to reach the imminent success on the other side. If you are carrying trauma, I know you’re willing. You just might not have the resources or the right support to help you get there. Again, baby steps can end up being more powerful sometimes than huge leaps of faith. That way the part of your brain that tries to keep you in the familiar won’t kick up such a fuss when you do something out of the ordinary to help yourself.
I often tell my clients to make your thoughts, beliefs and evidence about the way you want to experience your life BIGGER and LOUDER than those other voices in your head that tell you you’re not good enough or something is wrong with you.
It’s not easy at first but the more you practice amplifying your positive experiences in your mind and heart, and cut down your attention and action on things that keep you unhappy… you will see your life change for the better.
Love & Blessings,
Brenda MacIntyre, Medicine Song Woman
- Want to dive right in and get some support? Head over here.
FOLLOW ME ON SPOTIFY – MUSIC FOR THESE CRAZY TIMES:
- Follow My Artist Account on Spotify.
- Follow my Global Pandemic Playlist on Spotify. The studio (CD, not live) version of the songs I sang in the livestreamed concert are also in this playlist.
- Follow the RENEWAL Playlist for springtime on Spotify