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3 Sweet Tips for Handling Frustration #TruthbyBrenda

Mental Health | 0 comments

I’m really frustrated. I’ve been having all kinds of technical difficulties with Facebook and my email. I’ve been feeling emotionally irritated and angry as well “for no reason”, which is just part of the package of grieving. I’m noticing that because of this grief, I’m getting better at allowing emotions to flow through me… and sometimes I get up in my head too much about it, so that I don’t have to feel what’s coming up. My grief counsellor helpfully called me out on that recently.

It’s been really hard to just witness myself in the feelings that come up, or watch myself swear at the computer. And sometimes I still keep on going even though I know something isn’t working and that if I just stop, I can come back at it with a fresh perspective and without being in freak-out mode. Thankfully those moments don’t take over the way they used to.

I wasn’t sure what I was going to write about today but here you go. Here are 3 tips to help you deal with frustration and other emotions or self-sabotage trying to get in your way or stop you from doing what you love or being who you are:

1. Have a Temper Tantrum! Spiritual teacher and author Julia Rogers-Hamrick encourages people to do what she calls a “Number 3”: Limit yourself to a few minutes and let yourself have the temper tantrum. And I mean do it up real good. Hahaha. Seriously! No holds barred! Once the time is up, let it go and move on with your day. You might find you’re already feeling silly and laughing about it. Or you might still need to put out the fire.

2. Be a gentle witness of yourself. Step back and pause for a moment. Notice what’s going on. How are you feeling in your body? What emotions are lit up? Why do you think you’re frustrated or irritated? Is it that you’re not getting your way? Or maybe someone isn’t behaving how you wish they would? Or that long lineup? Notice that you may or may not be able to change your frustration in the moment you observe it and let that be okay. One question I often ask myself if I’m frustrated is “How old am I right now?” That gives me a chance to check in with that aspect of myself, that inner child or teen or young adult, and give her some extra love. Sometimes that alone can diffuse the situation.

3. RESET: Take a deep breath into your belly. Take another few deep breaths. Deep breathing can give you a spiritual and emotional reset. Don’t use the breathing to stop expressing your frustration or other emotions. Use it to reset your energy and take the witnessing to a deeper level. You might even do some journaling if you’re in a situation where you can do that. See if you can get to the root of what’s happening for you.

FYI, don’t consider these steps. You can do them in whatever order you like or you might only  need one of them to help you move through frustration – or frankly any other negative emotion.

The bottom line is this: Frustration can become a distraction to disconnect you from your purpose and who you really are. Remember, don’t shut it down. It can also be a catalyst for creation and living your dream.

Let frustration move through you, so it can’t take hold of you.

Please share on the blog any insights or aha’s you might have about frustration. I’d love to hear about it. (:

Love & Blessings,

Brenda MacIntyre, Medicine Song Woman



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About Brenda MacIntyre

About Brenda MacIntyre

Known by her indigenous name Medicine Song Woman, Brenda MacIntyre has shared her evocative melodic voice and fusion of reggae, rap and indigenous hand drum healing music with appreciative audiences of 30 to 3,000 across North America. The Toronto-based Juno Award-winning singer has been featured nationally on MuchMusic, CTV, CP24, APTN and most recently, Global and the front page of the Toronto Star.

Powered by her grief from losing her son to murder in 2016, Brenda MacIntyre pours her soulful voice over a confluence of indigenous hand drum healing, soft rap and conscious roots reggae in her album “Picking Up the Pieces,” released in September 2019.

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